Send this one back to the kitchen...

By Phantom

Steve Carell stars as “Big Dumb Steve Carell” in Steve Carell’s Big Dumb Movie a/k/a Dinner for Schmucks.  I’m not sure what possessed anyone involved to barf up this big dumb meal on to cineplex screens...

As mentioned above, Steve Carrel plays Dumb Steve, here known as Barry, in what might be the dumbest Steve he’s ever played.  The only problem is, it isn’t funny this time.  It’s excruciating.  (“Oh look!  Dumb Steve Carrel broke something and doesn’t know what he did! HAHAHAHAHAHA.  Best movie of all year!”)  In order to amplify the (non)laughs, Paul Rudd plays hapless Paul Rudd who bears the brunt of Steve Carell’s antics.  Why either wastes their considerable talent and charm in dreck like this is unbeknownst to me.

The one trick pony of a plot (Steve Carell is dumb and breaks stuff) is pulled along by the Rudd’s character, “Stockbroker Tim,” and his desire to impress his boss and a potential client by bringing an idiot to a dinner that awards a prize to whoever brings the biggest dumbass.  Tim wants to win the contest, yet somehow the audience ends up losing.

I guess the camera work was well done, but at this point it’s like saying I liked the font in my calculus textbook.  It’s boring and unfunny.  (Derivates! HA!).  Unlike learning calculus, however, the repetition does not bode well for this film.  The same thing happens, over and over again.  And then the same thing happens again.  Steve Carell breaks stuff and Paul Rudd gets mad.  For.  Two.  Hours.  Herein lies the main fault of the movie, and the cardinal sin of any film: it’s boring.

It’s a well known, if unspoken axiom that in film criticism the bad movies are some of the best reviews to read if only to hear the reviewer’s version of an insult comic.  And yes I’ve played the game above (You’re welcome sadistic readers.  I’m half sorry to cast and crew – this movie is pretty bad...) but to be honest, leaving the theater, I couldn’t even think of snarky jokes.  This movie is just too bland to even laugh at.  Its juvenile slapstick can’t even appeal to youngsters since abundant (and unfunny) ribald humor appears throughout making it inappropriate for them. 

I suppose there was a good film that could have been made.  The use of Carell’s stuffed mice as a representation of his inner thoughts might have brought out a little heart in the film.  There was one brief picture of a lonely mouse drinking a cheese milkshake that seemed sincere but was lost in a sea of mundane “jokes.”  This angle is underdeveloped and when the Rudd and Carell *Spolier Alert!* finally become best friends at the end of the film it feels false and flat.
 
Go rent Hot Tub Time Machine if you’re a grown up wanting dumb laughs, and Despicable Me is a much better, much funnier film for kids.

© 2010 Beyond the Films.

Salt Review

 By Phantom

Salt is the latest action-thiller from Angelina Jolie (Tomb Raider series), veteran Tom Clancy director Phillip Noyce (Clear and Present Danger), and screenwriter Kurt Wimmer (Equilibrium, The Recruit). 

Salt follows Jolie as Evelyn Salt a CIA-operative that might be a Soviet Double Agent.  She might even be a Triple or Quadruple Agent.  The action begins when a mysterious Russian defector walks into a CIA building, discredits Salt in seconds and she immediately begins to flee from a Soviet plot 20 years out of date.  From here, the film begins a chase sequence that lasts until the credits.  Among her pursuers are Liev Schreiber (X-Men Origins: Wolverine) and Chiwetel Ejiofor, CIA agents who were formerly worked with Salt.  Along the way, there are twists and turns, ranging from completely obvious (do you ever truly question what country Salt is going to side with in the end?) to the ones that actually work… possibly in part by doing a slight of hand that keeps us quasi-guessing about Salt’s identity and our focus off of Twist B.  That really is the gist of this movie.  Chasing with some sequences that work well, and some that work less so.  The film is never  afraid to delve into the ridiculous and I found myself frequently saying “really?” but to its credit I was never bored.  Possibly the most ludicrous sequence is CGI Salt jumping from rafter to rafter in an elevator shaft with moves that would give Spider-Man a run for his money.  At least when she was jumping from semi-truck to semi-truck on a triple-decker overpass it looked like a real stuntwoman…

While the action is hit and miss, the film does take a few risks that set the film apart.  Without giving too much away, the film wasn’t afraid to let the main character be a bad guy even if we know who she will side with in the final act.  The other main “risk,” as many people have written about, is that the main character is female.  Originally written for a man, Salt’s role is typical action hero bits, but made fresh by letting a female play the part.  She pines over her beloved spouse, as many an action hero has done but seeing a woman in the role gives a little freshness what might have been stale material if the Action Hero of the Week played the role.  I would, however caution that the film might not be quite as progressive as it sounds.  Yes, many action heroes have been tortured on screen, Mel Gibson’s protagonists are famous for them, but here it seems that Salt sheds more blood than guys stabbed in the neck or shot at point blank range… it’s not that I have an issue with our heroine suffering wounds, it’s that the film disproportionately shows hers compared to those of the men in this film.  You can probably read this a few ways, and I’d have to see the film again to offer any further insight… but regardless if there is some subtextual betrayal of our heroine, at the end of the day, a woman gets the chance to save the President.  And that’s pretty cool. 

Recommended for action-junkies who have already seen Inception.  Fans of Jolie’s action career and B-Scripter Kurt Wimmer won’t be disappointed either.  Everyone else can safely give it a pass.

(c)2010 beyond the films.

Despicable Me Review

-by Ann Marie

I’m having a bad bad day, it’s about time that I get my way. Steam rolling whatever I see, huh despicable me. (Pharrell Williams)


Steve Carell is back on the screen as Gru, competing to become the world’s greatest villain. This might seem like a piece of cake, but for Gru it’s harder than it seems because he’s up against Vector, voiced by Jason Segel, a hotshot newcomer. The movie begins with tourists in Egypt looking at the pyramids. A family with an anxious child breaks away from his parents and climbs up a scaffolding and falls onto one of the pyramids. At the point the audience realizes the pyramid was stolen. The audience then meets Gru and his theme song plays while we follow him home. That’s when Gru learns the pyramid has been stolen and it wasn’t him. Realizing he was schooled, Gru consults with his minions, little yellow blobs that actually go by the name "minions", in his lair and talks about his plan to capture the moon. Gru goes to the bank like any good civilian or in this case villain asking for a loan, but instead is told he needs to steal a shrink ray before he can receive a loan from the bank. Unfortunately for Gru the race is on to get to the moon and steal it before Vector does.

Some of the popular voices behind the characters are Steve Carell (Get Smart) and Jason Segel. Joining those two on the screen are Julia Andrews as Gru’s Mom, Will Arnett as Mr. Perkins, Russell Brand as Dr. Nefario and many more. Everyone worked well on the screen for a children’s movie.

The editing pieces of the movie are quite simple because of the animation for the movie. They were done beautifully, no mistakes or confusion on story.

The humor throughout the movie was good for both adults and children. The simplistic humor in the movie helped lighten the story and helped movie it along. I especially liked the scene when the minions were photo copying their butt and kept holding up the picture saying butt and then giggling. Although this humor would seem a little immature, it added to the movie because these minions don’t speak English well, but know a word or two from listening to Gru or the other characters. The whole scene reminded me of how immature and at the same time adorable the minions are throughout the movie. The simplest humor makes them laugh and even after chaos happens behind them, they still laugh about the photo copy.

Despicable Me was directed by Pierre Coffin and Chris Renaud, both of which played voices of the minions in the movie. Coffin also worked on Gary’s Fall back in 2003. Despicable Me is only his second movie he has directed. Renaud helped with many movies such as Horton Hears a Who! and Ice Age: Dawn of the Dinosaurs. However, if you watched the bonus of Ice Age: Dawn of the Dinosaurs you would have seen No Time for Nuts which was his piece he directed. These two currently don’t have any other projects they are working on at this time.

I recommend this film to both adults and children. The film has humor for all ages, but is geared toward rude humor even though it’s rated PG. I also recommend this film for people who are fans of Steve Carell or Jason Segel.

© 2010 Beyond the Films.